His Scars & Mine

“If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word is not in us.”

1 John 1:6-10

Sin has a very particular power over a person when he or she keeps it hidden. We think that if we don’t let anyone know what really goes on in hearts or behind closed doors, then they won’t see how broken we really are. So sin wants to stay hidden. And it will use shame to make sure we do just that. “If anyone knew the truth about you, they’d think you were disgusting,” it says. “You’d lose you’re closest friends, and no one would ever look at you the same way.” And if we believe the lies, we’ll hide. We’ll pretend to be ok, and allow sin to do its destructive work inside of us, eating away at us, until that fake shell is all that is left of us.

But the gospel tells us something completely different. The gospel says that in our weakness, Jesus is made strong. The gospel says that we have no secrets, no sin, of which God cannot forgive us. The gospel tells us that God’s grace is so much deeper than our sin, or our ability to sin. And so Jesus tells us to bring our sins out into the light. James 5:16 instructs us to confess our sins to one another, and pray for each other so that we may be healed. Jesus says that if we let the world see us for who we really are, then they will see Him for who He really is. Because when we admit our inadequacy, we are telling the world that we need a Savior who is powerful enough to forgive even our worst acts, and deepest shame. And the world will see that Jesus is that Savior.

There’s a funny thing about the scars left behind by our sin. And for many of us, we have wounds that aren’t even scars yet—they’re open and hurting worse than ever. But when we uncover our scars, and kneel before the throne of Jesus, and we ask Him to heal our scars, miracles happen. You see, when I show my scars to Jesus and ask for help, He shows me His. I see the holes in His hands and His feet, and in His side. I see the stripes of a whip across His back. I see how He got them all for me. And as Jesus shows me His scars, mine begin to heal. 

Good & Faithful Servants

I’ve never been to a Mars Hill (Seattle) Church campus. I’ve watched quite a few sermons online, and even received an offer to intern at one of the Seattle campuses. But in spite of so little contact with their church, tonight I was profoundly touched by their ministry. I took the time to watch their latest video project, “God’s Work, Our Witness”—their new documentary tracing the life of the church back to its most humble beginnings. I listened as Pastor Mark described the difficulty with which he had attempted to answer God’s call on his life to plant churches. I saw pictures and old video footage of how rough things were early on. I heard stories from people who had been a part of it all from the beginning. There were people who weren’t anywhere close to being church-going Christians who accepted Christ, and joined in Pastor Mark’s efforts when Mars Hill was a homeless, nomadic body of rag-tag believers trying to learn how church worked. They faced trials. They faced opposition. They faced discouragement. They faced failure. And yet they stayed faithful.

            After years of struggling to keep their church in tact, Mars Hill began to finally experience growth. It wasn’t prosperity just yet, but it was encouraging. And as people started coming to hear Mark present the gospel, they were finally seeing the fruits of their labor. But just as the title would suggest, it wasn’t actually their labor that was drawing inexplicable crowds. Their toil was in service to the One who was really at work all those years. It was God who was calling those people to him. And the staff, and faithful members of that early Mars Hill Church were filled with joy at the sight of God’s name being lifted high above their own. This was so beautifully exemplified last Easter at Quest Field, home of the Seattle Seahawks. Nearly 20,000 people gathered to worship the Lord, many of whom were coming to be baptized for the first time. Many football fans may know of a popular ritual at Seahawks games, wherein a privileged individual raises the Seattle flag high above the stadium. And on that particular Sunday, the flag they raised was a white banner with red letters that simply said “Jesus.” It almost sounds cheesy, doesn’t it? Raising the Jesus flag. But after hearing the story of where this church had come from, and seeing where it’s come today, seeing that flag raised above 20,000 worshippers, all celebrating its ascent, I choked up. I couldn’t help it. It was such an incredible moment to witness.

            What I learned from the story of Mars Hill was this: when I know what God calls me to do, I am expected to faithfully answer His call. And the truth is that sometimes He’ll call me somewhere that may be so dark that I won’t know up from down, and all I’ll be able to do is cling tightly to Him, trusting that He knows what He’s doing. And success won’t be about my fame, or my comfort. I’ll know I’ve succeeded when I can stand with the people He’s put in my life, and with them, celebrate the name of Jesus being lifted high.

            In seeing how they have so humbly given themselves over for the work of the Lord, I have no doubt that the men and women who have helped grow Mars Hill Church will one day stand before God and hear Him say to them, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” I want to hear those words, too. I want to give my life to lifting high the name of Jesus. 

Happy Birthday, Jack

In honor of C.S. Lewis’ birthday, it is only fitting that I pay tribute to a man who has been instrumental in my growth as a Christian.

My junior year in college was among the most significant times in my life. I was being faced with some of the most difficult trials I’d experienced in my life, and some harsh realities were being brought into the light. It was a time when God was moving violently in my life. What felt like destruction was actually His way of tearing away the things that stood between Him and me. God had shaken the ground beneath my feet so much that when it finally stopped, all that was left standing was the truth that Jesus was what I really needed. And it was at that point when I began to truly pursue a real relationship with God. It’s safe to say that it was one of the single best things that have ever happened to me.

As a result of God taking hold of my attention, I sought out sermons, and read my bible more diligently than ever before. And as I began to thirst for knowledge about God, the writings of C.S. Lewis became an addiction of mine. I fell in love with the way that he wrote. There was something about the way Lewis described God that ignited a fire in my heart. And C.S. Lewis was there when I needed help pursuing God.

Lewis was a professor of English literature. He called his childhood “blandly Christian,” but spent much of his young life rationalizing against God, professing devout atheism. Upon his conversion, he described himself as “the most reluctant convert in all of England.” He would go on to write some of the most popular books in all of Christian literature. And to his friends, Clive Staples Lewis was simply known as “Jack.”

Romans 1:20 states that creation screams of who God is, and I think few people have ever been so perceptive to those cries as C.S. Lewis. One of my favorite things about Lewis is his ability to compose illustrations that made truths about God so much easier to understand, and even pass on to someone else. Perhaps it was that ease of understanding that made me so passionate. Among his most famous works was the children’s fantasy collection, The Chronicles of Narnia. Although Lewis could write at the highest levels of intellect, through the Chronicles of Narnia, he made the principles of Christianity easy enough for a small child to understand and enjoy. His gift was helping people to understand who God was, and he could do it for people of all ages and reading levels. He certainly did so for me.

In terms of his doctrine, I find many differences between Lewis and myself. But in spite of those differences, Lewis’ words acted as sorts of road signs, pointing me on towards God. And he lit a fire in my soul with the poetic assembly of his stories and ideas. In The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, Lewis used a mouse named Reepicheep to show us that size and stature have nothing to do with boldness when pursuing God—that anyone can be courageous if our heart is set on God.

“My own plans are made. While I may, I sail East in Dawn Treader. When she fails me, I row East in my coracle. When that sinks, shall I paddle East with my four paws. Then, when I can swim no longer, if I have not yet reached Aslan's Country, there shall I sink with my nose to the sunrise.”

Chills. Every time. And since first reading his words, I have an inexplicable longing for Aslan’s Country.

Because of Lewis, I am more in love with Jesus than I was before I read his writings. I hope that when my life comes to a close, it bears that same mark—I hope that people will be more in love with Jesus because they knew me. It’s why I think I was put on this earth. Happy birthday, Jack. 

A Man Worth Following

As men, the bible tells us we are called to lead. I think this is most essential in the home—as husbands and fathers. God designed men and women differently for a very specific purpose. Though I’m a single 20-something male, I feel like God allows me the grace to learn new things about this every day. Whether through scripture, through teaching, or through watching and spending time with my married friends, I think I learn something new about the unique roles of men and women every day.

What has me most fascinated today is the ability we as men have to answer this call God has given us in our relationships with women, through the idea of respect. I’ve often heard it said that women want to be loved, and men most desire to be respected. It makes sense, doesn’t it? How many women (and girls) do you know who have shown a desire for someone’s love and attention. So many girls do this in the way they dress, or the way they behave around guys. They dress in a way they know appeals to guys, and they act flirtatiously to hold their attention. It’s not hard to spot, even if you’re not looking that hard.

But isn’t it just as true of most of the guys you know, and their desire for respect? Men are so often trying to seem as “manly” as possible, so that women (not just one, but all) will fawn over them, while other men will look at them without any doubt that, they are, in fact, a “man’s man.” Men are competitive because when you’re the best at something, people respect you. Men work out and go an entire month without shaving so that other men will look at them and be impressed, respecting their manhood.

Men desire respect. And in their desire to be loved, women often give men that respect. It’s a natural process, and it starts with how we were created. But I think our abuse of a woman’s respect, and women’s abuse of men’s love can lead to dysfunction, and there’s a lot of that in this world. But the system itself isn’t a mistake. It can be good.

And what I wanted to point out was the ability we as men have, to take advantage of the respect we are given, and use it for the good of those giving it. I’ve watched a lot of women give men respect, and then follow them into relationships, and then into marriage, and the men were never deserving of their respect in the first place. They get hurt because they followed men who didn’t care about where they were leading them. But as much as that relationship between a man and a woman can hurt either of them, it can also be a very beautiful thing if done right. I’m talking about men who take that respect and use it as their called to do biblically.

When a woman would be willing to date us, or marry us, she has given us exactly what we want and need—respect. She gives us the power to lead, because she’ll follow wherever we go. The bible tells husbands that they are responsible for the sanctification, or spiritual growth, of their wives. Here’s their chance.

Leading isn’t hard. Girls follow bad guys all the time. But leading well can be. And when a woman gives us her respect, we have the opportunity to lead her to the Cross. And what I’m starting to understand is that the best way to do this is not to beat my chest and prove that I am worth following. I think the way to do this is to fall to my knees and admit that I have to follow Someone, too. A man worth respecting isn’t just a man who leads, it’s a man who leads somewhere worth going. And there’s nowhere more worth going than the Cross of Christ. So men, I hope that if you’re not doing this already, you look at what you do with the respect you’re given, and you think seriously about what you’re doing with it, and where you’re leading the people who follow you. 

Faith Like Children

When one of His disciples asked Jesus who the greatest in heaven would be, Jesus answered by presenting a child. He said that if anyone wanted to get into heaven, he’d have to turn and become like a child. And since we know that Jesus also said that He is the only way to God, what Jesus was saying here was that in order to accept the free gift of grace, we have to confess dependence. Jesus was showing that children are perfect examples of this dependence. Their innocence and immaturity is what makes them able to accept grace. And our belief that we are self-sufficient—our independence—is what keeps us from God. When we think we’re ok on our own, it’s a declaration to God that we don’t need Him, and that He’s not everything He says He is.

Somewhere along the way, as we grow up, something in us tells us that we need to be independent. We begin to believe that we can do anything we want, and we don’t need anyone’s help to do it. And when we fail, who is there to catch us? The world can be cruel and unforgiving. Often, we let the people tell us that we are the sum of our failures. But everything’s different when we’re walking with Jesus. When we hold His hand, we may not know where we are, but we’re never lost. When we follow His direction, we may be scared, but we’re never unsafe. When we lean on Him, we may feel weak, but we’re not without strength. And when we fall, His hand is always there to help us up again.

Jesus wants us to realize our own inadequacy, because until we do, we can never fully rely on Him. We were created with a hole in our chest. It’s a hole that can only be filled by God. Jesus knows that, and He wants us to feel complete. So in His mercy, Jesus allows us to feel the pain of failure when we’re on our own. It’s a means of calling us back to Him. He wants us to depend on the only thing that can support us: Himself.  So instead of “growing up” and being good all by ourselves, maybe we ought to try growing into total dependence. Let us be like children who long to follow after their Father. 

Puzzle Pieces

Have you ever thought about how many questions we ask during the course of our lives? Some of them are simple: what will I have for lunch? Will it rain today? What kind of pet do I want? And some are harder to answer: Am I ready to get married? Where will my next paycheck come from? What’s my purpose on this earth? That’s a question I imagine people will be asking until we’re no longer here to ask it anymore. And each time we ask one of these questions, it’s as though we’re picking up a piece to an intricate jigsaw puzzle and searching for it’s place. 

To me, it’s seems clear that the puzzle we’re piecing together couldn’t be here in the first place if there was no one to make it. Maybe you don’t believe Someone had to have made it. Maybe you don’t really even think there is a puzzle at all. But it’s hard to put puzzles together when you don’t believe in puzzles in the first place. For the better part of my life, I’ve been pretty confident that God is the Maker of it all. But more than just the Creator, He is the purpose-Giver.

And I think we were given such intricate and amazing minds so that we could enjoy the journey of figuring it all out. We’re born without answers, and as we grow, we ask questions. With each new experience, we learn. Some of us learn harder lessons than others. And some of us search a little harder than others. But we all start with blank canvases, and when we reach the end of our lives, God has painted a masterpiece.

Each question is a puzzle piece. And every answer we get is a piece put in its place. But the puzzle’s not easy. In fact, I think you could even argue that the more pieces we put together, the further we realize we are from the picture on the box. And one thing that we all have in common is that none of us get to see the finished product before we die. But what about after? I believe some do. I think for those in Jesus, there is opportunity to see it all as it was meant to be. And it’s not just a finished puzzle, but a picture never cut in the first place—a pure, unaltered image of what we all search to find in this life. And I think that view will make the journey worth all the ups and downs it took to get there. We’ll get to see it through the eyes of the One who made it all, standing once for all by His side. And I cannot wait for that day. 

Stories With Jesus

Recently I started to feel an itch somewhere deep inside me in a way I never have before. It was a sort of longing that has grown stronger by the minute. It’s an urge, a craving for something I’ve never thought much about—adventure. Donald Miller writes beautifully on the subject, and I’ve fallen in love with his books. From him, I’ve learned how we ought to try to live better stories, so that our lives will be full of stories worth telling when we’re older.

I’ve reviewed my life and surveyed the contents for the best stories. I’ve got a few good ones. But when I get to heaven, and I’m walking with Jesus face-to-face, what stories will I tell him? And I don’t mean how people tell stories to someone for the first time, as if informing them about events that took place. I mean telling stories the way you do when you’re catching up with all your old friends. Last summer, my best friend got married in New Mexico. All of our closest friends came together and the guys all spent a couple nights in a cabin together. The night before the wedding, we all sat around the fire in what was easily one of the greatest experiences of my life. We reminisced about the lives we’d lived together so far. We remembered back to times when we were living in the same house in college, or when we went to someone’s lake house for a long weekend and stayed out on the water all day long. We were up until the early hours of the following morning, laughing so hard that we cried—and we were telling stories. They weren’t stories that any of us hadn’t heard a hundred times before. But they were stories that we loved telling together over and over again. Those are the kind of stories I’m talking about telling Jesus.

And it’s not as though we even could tell God a story He doesn’t already know. He sees everything we do—everything that happens to us. But if we don’t invite Him into our stories, then that’s what we’d be doing when we’re sitting there with Him—trying to tell Him stories we lived like He didn’t see the whole thing. What I think is most important about the stories we tell Jesus is whether or not He was in them. I want my stories to be about the times He and I shared together. I’ll have eternity to spend with Him, so I’ll want a lot of good memories to talk about.

I think God wants us to tell Him stories like that night around the fire. He wants to reminisce with us about all the best and worst times in our lives. He wants to laugh with us about the times that we embarrassed ourselves in front of a crowd of people, or almost died because we thought jumping off a bridge into a river would be worth the thrill. I think He wants to hear us tell the stories of the times we hurt the worst so that He can watch our faces as we realize—finally—why He let it all happen. 

I’m planning a pretty big trip for the summer, after the snow on the mountains thaws. It’s a trip during which I’ll be on the road by myself for a really, really long time. Normally I’m not crazy about driving alone for too long. But in this case, I can’t wait to get on the road. I’m going to have countless hours in some of the most beautiful places in the country, and the only One I’ll be able to share it with is the One who created it all. And honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m hoping that when it’s over, I’ll have made a lot memories and lived a lot of stories that I’ll get to talk about with Jesus when I get home.

But what about today? What about the times when we’re not on the open road, chasing adventure, pursuing stories far from home? I think we actually have opportunities for stories a lot more often than we realize. I think every day is a new opportunity to live a great story. But if I’m being honest, I rarely live that way. In fact, most of my days are spent living towards a time when I think I’ll really be doing something that’s “story-worthy.” But each day God gives us is a clean slate—a chance to start a new story. So when I wake up tomorrow, will I live that way? Will you?

One Pain, Two People

To simplify things, let us say that there are two kinds of people in this world: There are those who believe in the saving grace of Jesus Christ, and have received salvation in Him; and there are those who do not believe, and have not yet been saved to Him. But one thing both of them have in common is pain. Few, if any, ever make through this life without ever experiencing a substantial amount of pain. And nearly everyone, at one time or another, has asked the question, "How could a loving God allow pain to happen to His people--or to anyone for that matter?" The answer is not a simple one by any means, but we can rest assured that all pain serves a specific purpose within the will of God. I think that regardless of the person, pain is always allowed to happen for one purpose--to push the one in pain closer to God. 

Now this process does not always look the same, nor will it always have the same result. As I mentioned, there are two different kinds of people--Believers and non-Believers--but both have choices in the face of pain. And though their circumstances are vastly different, those choices are quite similar. When experiencing pain, a person can do one of two things--he can either turn from God, or run to Him. 

For the non-Beliver, the choice he makes is often to say that his pain is clearly evidence that no "God of Love" could possibly exist, if he has been allowed to feel such pain. But he may also see things another way: "If pain is basically inevitable, how am I to deal with it?" Or perhaps, "Can I face that pain alone?" If he is asking this question, then he is well on his way to realizing exactly what God desperately wants him to understand--that although he has the choice to live apart from God, he most certainly needs God in his pain. 

For the Believer, the choice is almost the same. When one who has experienced the saving grace of Jesus comes into pain, he may decide that this is "not what he signed up for" and decide that living close to God is too dangerous, and perhaps he'd face less pain if he were to walk away (I do not intend to get into whether or not a man can lose his salvation, nor is that what I am suggesting here. This is more about the choice of a life lived apart from God, not necessarily apart from His salvation). For the Believer who is walking closely with Jesus, however, he will know that pain serves a great purpose. He will often see pain as a sort of reminder: for as long as we experience pain, we know that we are in a fallen, broken world. But one day, pain will be lost. It will not follow us past death, where we will experience eternity in the sweet presence of the One who put death in its grave, once and for all. 

So it would seem that the decision we make about pain would be largely based on what we know about the God who allows it. If we understand the gospel of Jesus Christ, then we know that accepting his saving grace does not mean the end of our pain. It is more of a new lens through which to see our pain, and a way for us to deal with it. When we truly know Jesus, we know that we can take our pain to Him, and that He wants to walk with us through it. After all, it was Jesus who came to this earth to carry the load of all of our sins on his back, and hung on a cross to pay that debt. If he would do that for us, why not take our pain to Him now? 

Even Just One

Tonight I had the privilege of attending a Young Life banquet. I knew pretty well what to expect going in, and was looking forward to seeing many of my friends. But one particular moment caught me off guard, and still, hours later, has my attention.

The general purpose of the banquet is to provide a little entertainment, offer a gospel message or two, and inform supporters of the ministry what’s been going on for the past year, and what to expect in the year to come. Several awesome videos were put together, and I’ll admit I almost cried in two of them. But the particular moment to which I was referring was when a young high school senior boy stood in front of the 400 or so adults in attendance and shared about the impact of Young Life in his life.

He began his story by saying that his father essentially walked on his family when he was only ten or twelve. He could have spent more time on that, but he instead focused on the positive: through the hardships, he and his brother and mother grew much, much closer. But it wasn’t long before his brother grew up and left the house, and the older role model that this young man so desperately needed was gone. It was at that time that he said Young Life came along and gave him a new perspective. His friend who invited him, and the Young Life leader who stood on stage behind him (a friend of mine) introduced him to the Jesus he never knew—the real Jesus. The Jesus who wasn’t just some man who lived and died a long time ago. The Jesus who was God in the flesh. The Jesus who died on a cross to bear our sins. The Jesus who still lives today. The Jesus who wants a relationship with each of us. And that Jesus was new to him. And when he met Him, he couldn’t avoid him anymore. He gave his life to Jesus, and credited Young Life with the introduction.

And as he stood up there telling everyone his story, it hit me. I looked around at all the people in the room who had contributed. Almost every single person there had given their time, their money, or both to support the mission of Young Life. That’s why they were all in this room together. And this high school senior was telling them all what their efforts had meant in his life. It was so beautiful. And at that moment all I could think was that even if this kid was the only kid who ever came to know Jesus through those efforts, it would have been worth it. There would be no regrets. And that’s how Jesus feels. Even if that boy had been the only person in the world saved by His death on the cross, He would have done it all the same. And that’s true for each and every one of us.

So remember, if you do anything to support a ministry, or just to reach out to any person you may know in order to bring them the gospel, take heart. God moves in those efforts. But even more importantly, He loves each of us enough to die on a cross—even if we were the only one He’d saved. 

The Walls We Build

I spent my summers in college working at my uncle’s moving company. I had the opportunity to work with some really fun and interesting people. They’re not all like the friends I had growing up, and I’m thankful for that. They helped me to see the world through different eyes. One of those guys was one of my favorite co-workers. I’ll call him Jim. As far as I knew, he’d been driving trucks for most of his adult life. He’s battled drug and alcohol problems, but was among the nicest people I’d ever met. He was a blast to be around. He told jokes and laughed at himself all the time. He genuinely just wanted to be friends with everyone around him. One day, I had the opportunity to talk about faith with Jim. He had some interesting viewpoints. He had a sister who suffered from Downs Syndrome, and he’d lost his mom to colon cancer when she was still pretty young. Jim was angry with God. He wasn’t the first person I’d ever met who was angry with God, but he was one of the few who admitted it. Most people who are angry with God take out their anger by claiming that God doesn’t exist. They reason that if God would do whatever it is that made them angry, then He couldn’t be very loving. And who wants to believe in God if He isn’t loving, and if He doesn’t want you to be happy? So Jim and I talked for a couple hours about how God could allow his sister to suffer her whole life, and how He could take their mom from them when they were still young. I wish I could remember what I told Jim. I hope I told him something about Joy—about real, God-centered Joy. You see, Joy isn’t just happiness. It’s satisfaction. It’s fulfillment. It’s total contentment, not necessarily in how things have turned out, but contentment in believing that you’re still not at the end. 

The way I see it, we’re part of this huge jigsaw puzzle that God’s putting together. Most of the time, all we can see is the small portion of the puzzle where we fit in. At times, it can be real hard to make out just how it’s all going to look when it’s all put together, but we have to realize that we’re not meant to see the big picture just yet. But God sees it. And He knows exactly how we’re supposed to fit in. And sometimes we don’t fit exactly where we’re supposed to go. We carry around some things that God doesn’t want us to hold onto. Because He wants us to become like Jesus, He has to break away some of that excess stuff. He has to bend us and even break us to make us fit where He wants us to go. It’s never easy to be bent or broken. It hurts. It’s even embarrassing at times. But God wants what what’s best for us. We don’t. And He knows exactly how to give it to us.

I didn’t say any of that to Jim. But I wish I had. Maybe it would have helped. But Jim didn’t just need some encouraging words from me. He needed God to work in his heart, and break through the wall he’s built around himself in anger.

I think a lot of us will shut God out when He takes something from us. Whether we lose a sister, or a parent, or a spouse. Or maybe it’s not even a life that’s lost—maybe it’s a job, or a relationship, or our comfort. But we often tend to hold a grudge against God when He moves into our lives and starts to work on our hearts. It’s never easy. I think one of the biggest reasons why people get upset when God takes something away is that they think God was supposed to be about giving, and never taking. We tend to feel like we’re entitled to something. Somewhere along the way, we got the idea that we deserve happiness. I haven’t read every verse of the bible, but I don’t think it ever suggests that God wants us to be happy, or that He’ll give us what we want, and never let us hurt. In fact, many of the people God uses throughout the bible suffer immensely. I love where Paul said in Romans 8:18, “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”

When we’re mad at God, it’s usually because we don’t trust Him. We don’t think that what He’s doing is in our best interest, or we think He doesn’t know what our best interest is, or both. It’s so important to remember that we’re not able to see the whole puzzle just yet, and that there’s a place that God wants to fit us into it. But until we’re willing to let him shape us, the pain will seem unbearable, and finding Joy in our struggles will be almost impossible. Trust God, and remember that the pain is only temporary. But our future glory will last forever.

For Jim, God will have to break down his wall. He’ll have to help Jim to understand that He is in control, and maybe more importantly, that what He allows Jim to experience—whether pain or prosperity—is because He loves him.

God loves all of us, and wants what’s best for us. The question is, in your pain, do you believe that enough to take your wall down? 

Stop Searching For Your Soul Mate

I feel a great need to start this particular entry with a disclaimer. I have never been in a serious relationship, and would, by many accounts, not qualify whatsoever to speak on this subject (at least not with any credibility). So I would ask that as you read this, please don’t hear me saying, “I did it this way, and so this is the right way.” Instead, I hope this will simply offer perspective on the matter—the perspective of a single, 24-year-old Christian male. I realize my experience is limited, but I think everyone can have wisdom, and wisdom comes in different ways, through different circumstances. Sorry it was a bit wordy, but THIS HAS BEEN MY DISCLAIMER.

The other day, I finally broke down and took Netflix’s advice. It had been suggesting for the better part of the last three months that I watch a movie called “What Dreams May Come.” It had Robin Williams & Cuba Gooding Jr., and I had read that it was about a man’s experience in heaven. So I gave in. Curiosity got the best of me.

I’ll go ahead and say that I had a lot of problems with the movie for a lot of reasons. It wasn’t a terrible movie by any means, but if it intended at all to paint a true picture of the afterlife, it failed miserably. At least according to the bible. But that’s not the topic of this entry (I’m sure I’ll talk heaven in a later entry). The problem I want to address at this point is the problem of “soul mates.” Yes, I said problem. In the movie, Robin Williams’ character dies before his wife (and shortly after their children), and winds up in heaven. But shortly after he gets there, he’s told that his wife took her own life, and as a result, wound up in hell. So upon hearing this news, Chris (Robin Williams) decides he is going into hell to bring her up to heaven (You may have noticed a couple of those other problems I mentioned having with this movie). Other characters warn Chris that he won’t be able to, until they find out that he and his wife have the rare connection of soul mates. Because of this unusually strong connection, Chris is able to do what was thought to be impossible—bring a soul to heaven from the depths of hell.

“What Dreams May Come” is hardly the first movie to present the idea that two people are simply made for each other—otherwise known as soul mates. It’s a romanticized idea as old as story-telling itself. Most of us have something inside of us that longs for completion. And somewhere along the way, we got the idea that such fulfillment could be found in another human being.

It really does seem so ironic to me that the world is moving more and more towards Godlessness, and yet we still believe in the idea that two specific people are naturally intended to end up together. People refuse to believe that an intelligent Creator spoke the earth into existence, and yet they desperately cling to the notion that a random, inanimate Universe had a plan from the dawn of time for them to find one particular life partner. But atheist and unreligious folks aren’t the only ones subscribing to this belief. Christians do it all the time. It just sounds a little different. They might say something like, “the person God intended for me to marry.” It’s just as dangerous.

You see, when we allow ourselves to believe that only one person in the whole world fits us compatibly, we eliminate all other options. We put an insane amount of pressure; not only on ourselves—to find “the one”—but also on the people we date. We have some sort of list that they have to live up to or they just aren’t right.

The reality is that if we all did this, no one would ever find a good fit. One person or the other would fall short of expectations, and then—whether it’s early in the relationship, or sometime after marriage—someone decides they’re excused to end it, and go find their soul mate. Because they obviously missed on the first swing. This, in my opinion, is the attitude at the heart of the problem of divorce in our world today. If you married “the wrong one,” then you have the right to leave and find “the right one.” It’s incredibly self-centered.

And let’s be honest. We ourselves are not perfect. If you look at the person you’re with and decide they don’t meet your standards for that elite soul mate status, you might want to look in the mirror. Because truthfully, you probably don’t live up to a lot of other people’s standards either.

I say all of this to make two points.

1)   We cannot find ultimate fulfillment in another person. That completeness we seek in a soul mate isn’t an illusion. We’re just looking in the wrong places. The only One who can take us in all our brokenness and put us back together, make us feel worthy, and give us the purpose we long for, is God. Jesus isn’t just our example, He is our Answer. He is the personification of God’s love and grace for us. If we accept Him, we find ourselves eternally accepted.

 

2)   Quit setting an unrealistic standard for the person you want to marry. Marriage isn’t about our happiness, but rather our holiness. It’s a means for God to shape us into the person He wants us to be. That means struggle. That means sacrifice. If we had a “soul mate” and everything was easy, we’d never grow in marriage. I’m not saying that you should lower your standards, but I might be telling you to reset your standards. Understand what kind of person God would want you to attach yourself to in marriage, and then understand that you’re not perfect, and neither is anyone you date. A close friend of mine once put it this way: Does she (or for you ladies, he) love Jesus? Check. Are attracted to her/him? Check. Do you enjoy your time together? Check. Then play. I loved that he used that term. “Play.” We often forget that within the boundaries God has set for us, He intends for us to enjoy Him and His gifts to the fullest. He has a plan for our lives, but He also gave us the freedom to make choices. And no matter the decision, there is almost always more than one path you could choose that would be in line with His will for your life. God so often gives us choices.

So stop searching for your soul mate. Turn your eyes heavenward, pursue God, and when He puts someone in your life that you think you could spend the rest of your life with, play. 

Nine Eleven

It’s been ten years, and like most of you, I remember the events of 9/11 like it was yesterday. And after these ten years, our response as a country, and many of the events that have unfolded since, I’ve seen my beliefs about our country and the rest of the world changed and re-formed.

Maybe I never got into “waving the Red White & Blue” quite as much because I always thought seemed strange that people would talk about how much they loved their country, but seemed far less enthusiastic about the God they claim to worship. I often hear people say “God bless America” and it sounds so empty when I see nothing that resembles gratitude to Him for the fact that they could even call themselves Americans in the first place. I am so glad that I was born in America rather than one of the many countries around the globe where my quality of life would be substantially below that which I experience here, but I think it’s important not to forget Who gave me the life I have in the first place, and pledge my allegiance first to Him. Even so, I certainly had my problems with what many people call “patriotism.” The most recent example is a time I allowed myself to get into an argument via a certain social networking site. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but it offended another American so much that he told me I could leave his great country (I left out some of his more choice words so as to keep this blog PG). “If you don’t love this country, then you can just get the [hell] out!” God bless America, right?

When news broke that Osama Bin Ladin had been killed, there was an understandable sigh of relief amongst most Americans. The threat of another attack like 9/11 was somewhat weakened, or so we hope. But then something else happened. Within hours of the news, footage from across America of parties in the streets went viral. College campuses everywhere were alive with chants of “U-S-A! U-S-A!” There was even a party right in front of the White House. Most of this craziness was a bunch of immature teenagers and twenty-somethings that just saw another reason to get drunk and celebrate something. But it was evident that people all over America were expressing their “patriotism” by laughing at and cheering the death of a man halfway across the world. It was no longer a matter of neutralizing a threat to our country’s values and the lives of our people. It was about us being better than someone else. It was pride. And it was disgusting. If you felt joy at the death of Bin Ladin, I’m not saying you’re a terrible person. But if the reason you felt that way was because you live in a country that is so good at killing people that even the most dangerous terrorist in the world cannot hide from us, you might want to check yourself.

I believe Osama needed to be stopped—so much so that I believe killing him was justified. But make no mistake. That man believed in something (no matter how skewed it was) and he did more in the name of what he believed in than any one of those crazy partiers in the Youtube videos (I’ll come back to this). It angers me to hear people talk with so much arrogance and disdain towards others just because those other people don’t hate as well as they do. Was Osama evil? I absolutely believe he was. But don’t sit on your couch and brag about America with a pride that makes people around the world roll their eyes at us.

I guess my point is that if you want to boast about a country with freedom, don’t waste that freedom. The pride of some of the people who claim to be patriots is no more than hatred. It’s often accompanied by racism, ethnocentrism, and downright disdain for anyone different from you.

But I don’t want this post to be about the bad things I see in America (because to this point you’re probably thinking, “Is this seriously his 9/11 blog post…on the 10^th anniversary??”). No, I want to move to the good—because this weekend has brought about a lot of nostalgia, and a lot of tears. Families still without husbands and fathers and wives and mothers and brothers and sisters and sons and daughters are mourning the loss of their loved ones from the darkest day in American history. Right now there are still thousands, if not tens of thousands, of U.S. Armed Forces men and women who are making immense sacrifices to not only protect our freedom, but to see freedom spread to places where people have never experienced it. And we’ve grieved the loss and celebrated the heroism of the many New York firefighters and policemen and women who died saving the lives of their fellow Americans. Those were moments when I had to fight back tears and felt chills going over my body. 9/11/11 was be a difficult day for everyone as we reflect once again on what happened ten years ago, and the loved ones who were lost.

So how do we move forward into the next ten years?

My challenge to you is to be more passionate about the things you believe in. If it’s freedom, you shouldn’t be condemning people without it, you should be doing something to help them gain it. Patriotism isn’t pride—it’s gratitude. And gratitude shouldn’t drive you to turn your nose up at those who didn’t share your good fortune of being born in America. It should drive you to spread that which you value. On this 9/11, I don’t want us, as Americans, to just be proud. I want us to be patriotic.

Thank You, God, that I was born in a country where I’m free to worship you. Thank You for the people who gave their lives to save some of the victims on September 11, 2001. Thank You for the men and women who give up their time and energy—and even their lives—to fight those who would see our freedom destroyed. May we feel their passion and their patriotism and do whatever we can to bring the freedom we know and love to places in this world where people know nothing of such liberty. May we always remember what that freedom costs us. God bless America. 

God In The Wildfires

It seems that the entire planet seems to have endured more natural disasters as of late—everything from hurricanes in the U.S., to earthquakes in Japan, to tsunamis in the South Pacific. But perhaps it is the geography of the latest headline-making crisis that has me thinking especially of the victims involved. Over the past few days, wildfires have torn through many highly populated areas in Texas. So close to home is this tragedy, that many of the affected areas have touched the lives of close friends of mine. So it seems natural that the infernos have me thinking more deeply of how such calamity pertains to God, and how we are to relate to Him.

The natural question at a time of tragedy is always, “Where is God?” These may not be the exact words a person speaks—perhaps it’s, “If God is loving, how could He let this happen?” or, “Why would God let His people suffer?”—but at the core, this is the question everyone is asking. “Where is God?”

Many of us have spent time praying for rain during these record-setting dry months. Even more of us have petitioned God in these past few weeks as our state has caught fire. We pray that God would change our circumstances. This is certainly a biblical practice, but then, God could have simply stopped the fires before they ever started in the first place, right? So the next question is, “If God could stop a fire before it starts, why would He allow it to burn homes and even take lives?” This is where it gets tricky.

As I ask this question, I think of what the pain the fires cause means in the first place. What I see is that God is using the fires for His good. In allowing these devastating fires to burn our homes, God is calling us to Himself. As we go to Him in prayer, something happens. You see, prayer isn’t simply our way of asking God for things—it’s our fellowship with Him. We need it. Our spirits cannot live without it. Like rain to a parched earth, God’s presence saturates our souls. When God stops the rain, He paints a picture with the soil of what our souls look like when we don’t have Him.

Honestly, I believe with all my heart that when God allows tragedy to befall us, it hurts Him every bit as much as or more than it hurts us. He does love us. But what is the greater love—to give us complete comfort apart from Him, or to wound us when we stray away from the one place we can have life? It sounds crazy, but if Jesus is life, and our only source of life, then to bring us back to Him would be entirely life-giving, and completely loving.

My encouragement to you is not that you would stop praying for God to stop these fires. In fact, I encourage you to pray all the more. But as you do, don’t simply ask God to stop our pain. Ask Him to come pouring into You that your heart would be saturated with His perfect love. “Father, please bring rain to our land to stop these devastating wildfires. And God, please come into my heart and soak me in your love and grace. Because like the soil of the earth, my heart thirsts desperately for the relief that only You can offer. Rain down on me.”

I once heard that the reason a shepherd carries staff or crook is so that when a sheep repeatedly strayed away from the flock, he could use his staff to break its leg to keep it from wandering off into danger again. It’s why they often carried a lamb around their shoulders, and why we often see Jesus depicted as doing just that. So in the 23^rd Psalm, when the Psalmist says, “You make me lie down in green pastures,” the imagery was such that God literally takes away our ability to walk so that we won’t stray away from Him. Because sometimes God has to cut our legs out from under us to show us how bad we need a Crutch.